How to compare things in a positive way

The essence of competition is comparison. Unfortunately, benchmarking can turn out to be a very daunting and demotivating experience, especially to those on the receiving end. Here are a few tips on ranking things, without having to "put down" the losing end.

1. Instead of bad/good, use good/better

James and Bill are both selling raffle tickets. James says, "You stand a chance of winning this small prize and this big prize!" Bill says, "You stand a chance of winning this big prize and this even bigger prize!" Guess who sold more tickets?

2. Be specific (and focus on individual strengths)

Instead of just "He's better than you!", consider "He's better than you at cooking, although he's no match for your babysitting."

3. Think improvement

It's frustrating to know you're bad at something without having the slightest clue on how to improve. Offer suggestions, especially if you're in the position to do so.

4. Use the right vocabulary

"Competency gap" sounds much better than "weakness". Likewise, "room for improvement" sounds better than "lack of ability". The list goes on.

And of course, the obvious: never humiliate! Elephants never forget; why would anyone else?